Wonderful Life
by chezchuckles
Summary: a Dash Companion  second in Life series
1. Chapter 1

**Wonderful Life** - a Dash Companion

* * *

><p>I thought of you again today<br>Reminded me how with time I've changed  
>If only you knew what you give to me. . .<br>It's a wonderful, wonderful life.  
>-Wonderful Life, Gwen Stefani<p>

* * *

><p>Kate shouldn't be so proud, but she is. She managed to get both kids to preschool and make it to the station on time - alone - for the third day in a row.<p>

Her phone rings as she's getting espresso from the machine. She knows it's him, but lets it go to voicemail so she can finish making her coffee. He'll understand.

She burns her hand on the steamer in her eagerness to call him back; it's been a while since she did that. After Dash was born and before Rick left the precinct, he gave her private lessons on how to operate the espresso machine. Very private. It's seared into her brain, that hot, steamy lesson.

Kate grins to herself, sips at her cup, burning the tip of her tongue but eager for caffeine. She didn't have the time this morning to make any, plus that's always Castle's job.

She calls him back. He answers immediately. "Hey there."

"Mm, coffee," she murmurs.

She hears him laugh, rich and deep. "Sexy, coffee voice. I love it."

"So where are you?" she asks, heading towards her desk, the phone tucked between her ear and her shoulder. She logs into her computer, takes another short sip, rifles through the folders piled up in her inbox.

"I'm in Chicago. How'd it go this morning?"

"Mm, I got the kids to preschool all by myself."

He chuckles again. "Good job, Beckett." His voice wraps around her last name like a caress.

"No fair teasing me when I'm at work and can't do a thing about it," she husks.

His laughter this time is a little breathless, just how she likes it. "There are about, ah, six people around me right now. Phone sex is not ideal for me either."

"Who said anything about phone-" She glances around swiftly, lowers her voice. "Phone sex? You and your dirty mind."

"Uh-huh. You say that, but we both know better."

"Two more days," she sighs.

"Yeah. Oh, darn. Gotta go. Kiss the kids-"

"Course."

"Love you."

"You too." She ends the call and puts her phone on the desk, works the kinks out of her neck by rotating her head side to side. She hasn't slept so hard in years. Must be having the bed all to herself and no furnace sleeping next to her all night, wanting to cuddle.

She grins, bites her lower lip as she checks the duty roster. She misses the furnace. And the cuddle. Funny enough.

* * *

><p>She's stuffing a bagel with cream cheese into her mouth when her phone rings. Castle again. Weird. She didn't think she'd have to tell him to not call her during the middle of a case, middle of the day - he usually knows better.<p>

She answers, chewing the dense mouthful as best she can around her greeting. "What's up?"

"Hey, uh, Kate?"

She swallows hard. "Castle. Why are you calling me?" she says, flicking crumbs off the financial records of their victim. Ryan walks back in with a bagel of his own - they've been in a bag in the break room fridge for who knows how long, but she and Ryan were both starving and it's fair game.

"Hey, yeah, the - the preschool just called me."

"What?" She drops the bagel, stands up from the conference room table. "Why? Why haven't they called me?"

"They usually call me first. I told them I'd have you call down there-"

"What's wrong?" Her stomach churns, the bagel a hard knot in her throat.

"Dashiell's sick."

She drops back into her seat, waving off Ryan. "Oh. Okay. All right."

"They think he has chicken pox."

She groans and buries her head in her hand. "Are you kidding me?"

"Yeah. Apparently, kids can get a light case if they're exposed to someone with the disease, and since he hasn't yet gotten the second dose-"

"He has until he's six. That's what Dr. DeLameran told me."

"Yeah."

After that single answer, Castle is silent on the other end - silently not judging.

It was her call - her decision not to let Dashiell get the second dose of the vaccine just yet, not after the hellish week the kid had as a 14 month old when he got the first dose. Fever, rash, no sleep, and she swears, she will always believe, that the rash with fever he got was a direct result of his immune system going nuts.

He's a sensitive kid - his body reacts differently. She wants to say all this in her own defense, but of course, her son is sick at preschool and she needs to get off the phone and go pick him up.

"Okay. I'm on my way to get him."

"And Ella," he adds softly.

"What? Why Ella?"

"Contagion."

Shiiiiip. She sighs, presses the heel of her hand into her eyebrow. "Good point. What am I going to do with Ellery? She hasn't gotten the shot either."

He's silent. Still not judging. She can hear her own mother's voice in her head though, _I told you so._

"Okay, all right. I'll figure it out. It's just for two days. Castle, you go. Do. Whatever. I need to get the boys caught up on this-"

"Yeah, I know. Kate. I'm sorry. I wish I could-"

"Hey, no. Don't." She clenches a fist as she stands up again, gathering files together, grabbing her jacket off the back of the chair. She had a hard enough time convincing him to do the book tour in the first place. "We'll be fine. This is no problem. Castle. Go do your thing."

"You sure?"

"You think I can't handle my own kids?"

"Kate." Exasperated with her for it.

"I'm sure." She presses her phone to her ear with her shoulder to free up her hands, waves Esposito into the conference room. "I gotta go. I'll call you later."

"I can't get to my phone again until eight your time."

"I'll call at eight."

"Okay." He sounds reluctant to hang up. "But if you need me, text me, and I'll keep checking-"

"Castle. Go," she says softly, turning her back on the boys, closing her eyes so she can hear just him. Just him. "We're fine. I got this."

"I know. I just - I hate that Dash has chicken pox and you've got both of them by yourself-"

"I'll call my dad for help if I need it," she says quickly. "Now, seriously. Go."

"Bye." He ends the call this time, and she sighs, lowers her phone.

"What's up, boss?"

Beckett turns, levels her gaze on her team. "Okay. I need to take the next two days off. Dash has chicken pox."

* * *

><p>Damn. She googled chicken pox before she left the station, and she totally should have caught it. Dash has been complaining about his ears hurting him for a week now - and apparently that's one of the early symptoms. And his sleep has been so good - another symptom.<p>

If Castle had been here this past week, he would've caught it. She's fairly certain of that.

She pulls into the church's parking lot and gets out quickly. On the phone, Kim from the preschool was so nice, so understanding about Kate needing an hour to clear her desk and get down here, but she doesn't want to presume on them much more than she has to.

She checks her gun, makes sure it's snapped into the holster, and swipes the key card over the lock. The door gives a faint buzz and she yanks it open, heads inside. No one is at the front desk when she starts through the lobby, so she moves towards the director's office.

Kim comes out of a classroom instead though, snags Kate by the jacket. "Hey. He's in here. I kept Ellery away from Dash, just in case she hasn't gotten it yet."

"Oh, thank you," she says, and slips into the room after Kim. The lights are off and Dash is asleep curled up on his rest mat, his hair sticking to his temple with sweat. "Does he have a fever?" she whispers, creeping closer.

"Yeah. It's mild though. I didn't give him anything in case you have specific instructions from your doctor?"

"Dr. DeLameran told me to call back when I saw him myself." She crouches over Dash, brushes her fingers through his hair.

"He's got spots on his stomach and his back, a few along his shoulders."

Kate sighs and slides her hand under her son's shirt, bringing it up so she can look. "Oh. Yeah, poor baby. That's chicken pox alright."

"I'll go get Ellery, if you want to take him out to the car?"

"Thank you," Kate whispers back, smiling. "Can I take his rest mat too? Wash it."

"Yeah, definitely. His backpack is by the door. I'll go get Ellery." Kim slips back out of the room, leaving Kate alone with Dash in the dark.

She slides a hand under his neck, pulls him upright so she can scoop him up. Oof, he's heavy for such a skinny thing. She gets him into her lap, wraps the soft rest mat around him for warmth - it's brisk outside, an early spring day that could turn rainy at any moment - and then she struggles to her feet.

Kate carries him back out into the hallway, through the lobby, pushing open the door with her hip and digging for her keys. She remote unlocks the car, balances Dash as she opens the back door, then props him up with a knee while she tries to lower him into the booster seat.

She nearly hits his head on the frame, manages to crack her own instead, and then pinches her finger in the seatbelt. She sucks on her maimed digit, wincing as her forehead throbs - it will bruise for sure - and then shuts the door softly on a still-sleeping Dashiell.

Which is totally unheard of. Dash never sleeps through anything. He's definitely a sick kid.

When Kate gets back inside the preschool, it's Kelly bringing Ellery out into the lobby. Kate jerks to a stop and puts a hand to her throbbing head, then lowers herself down next to her daughter, giving Kelly a smile of thanks.

"Hey, baby girl. Dash got sick. How are you feeling?"

Ellery stares at her, mouth in a firm line. But she reaches out a little finger and traces it over Kate's forehead.

"Yeah, ouch. I bumped my head-"

Ella leans in and kisses it, pulling back with a smile.

Kate sighs and smiles back, brushing a hand through Ellery's dark hair. "Thank you, baby. I needed that. You feel ok?"

Ella nods once, then peers around Kate as if looking for her brother.

"He's in the car. You ready to go home?"

"Actually, Kate-" Kelly starts.

Kate glances up at the woman, surprised. Kelly is friendly with her here, of course she is, but she's been dating Kate's father for the last few years and it's always been rather awkward. Kate just isn't sure what to do with the woman, how to act. Does she ask Kelly how her father is doing, or does she pretend that Kelly hasn't been spending her nights at Kate's father's house?

"Hey, Kelly," she says, standing back up, catching hold of Ella's hand, smoothing her thumb over her daughter's fingers.

"I was thinking - I figured you'd call Jim, your dad, right?"

"I haven't yet. But I think I'll have to," Kate says. It is so very weird to talk about her family with Kelly, not that Kelly isn't nice and so very sweet to Kate's kids, but Kate just keeps forgetting that Kelly probably knows quite a whole lot about all of them.

"Why don't I take Ellery home with me? To your dad's."

Home? To her dad's? Those . . . those words are synonymous now?

Kate rubs at her forehead, wincing, tries to use the flare of pain to clear her head. "Uh. Well. I don't want to pull you away from your job-"

"I talked to Kim and she'll take my class for the rest of the day. But only if you're comfortable with it, Kate."

Oh man, she's just too nice. Too nice. Kate can't even figure out a way to say no because she really, really wants to say yes. Yes, please take Ellery and keep her out of Dashiell's germy range of fire. Because if those two are at home together, Kate knows there is absolutely no way she can keep them apart.

Last night, Ellery was using Dash like a stepstool in front of the pantry, aiming for the nutella, probably. Kate caught them right before Ella could grab it or fall on her head. Although, to be fair, Ellery's got some natural balance and grace. Dashiell would have fallen. Probably not Ellery.

Which might be why they were working together on that one. Smart kids.

"Kate? You could put her carseat in my car; I could take her. I know your dad's got clothes and toys and stuff at his place."

Kate nods slowly. He does. And Dash has the freaking chicken pox. And it's a really miserable disease. Kate remembers it all too well - she got it twice. A light case both times, but bad enough to stick with her.

But, wow, Ellery's never been away from home like this before. Kate leans over and scoops her daughter up, cuddling her close. "Hey there, baby girl. Want to go visit Papa today?"

Ellery wraps her arms around Kate's neck, nuzzles in against her mother's skin.

"I need to take Dash home and get him some medicine and he's gonna be cranky and probably kinda whiny and mean because he's sick. So you want to go to Papa's with Kelly and have fun?"

Ellery lets go, leans back as if to study her mother. She uses two hands to push her hair back from her eyes, and Kate uses that opportunity to lean in and kiss her nose.

"What do you say, baby girl? You can spend the night with Papa. I bet he'll show you his workshop. You want to go?"

Ellery glances over at Kelly. The older woman holds out her arms and takes Ella when the girl leans over. It's not a definite yes, but it's probably all Kate's going to get from the silent one.

"Thank you, Kelly. Really. I - I really appreciate this-"

"Oh, it's nothing, Kate. Ella and I are good friends. Right, sweetheart?"

Ellery gives her a shy little smile and looks back at Kate.

"Oh, good. You guys will have fun then." Kate smooths down Ellery's hair, brushes her thumb over her daughter's cheek. She meets Kelly's eyes, tries to force some cheer into her smile. "Thank you. This helps me a lot. Tell my dad to call me?"

"Of course. And Ellery can call you too, whenever she likes. How's that, Ella?"

The little girl gives Kelly a huge smile, something like relief on her face, and it strikes Kate that Ellery probably feels like she's getting shuttled away, handed off. At least Kelly isn't a stranger. Actually, Ellery really does like Kelly, Kate remembers, and she seems at ease in her arms.

"Yeah, you better call me," Kate murmurs, leaning in to kiss Ella's cheek. "I love you, little cricket. Be good for Papa. Call me before bedtime, and I can tell you a story over the phone."

"Yeah," Ella says softly.

Kate grins widely, her heart fluttering at the sound. "Yeah." She clears her throat and turns to Kelly. "You have my cell phone number-?"

"I got it. We'll be fine."

"I know," Kate says, nodding at her. She does. "I just - she's never been away from home." Kate gives a soft laugh, but Kelly's eyes have turned tender, knowing.

Kate shakes it off, gives her daughter a big smile. "All right, let's get your car seat so you can go."

She turns and leads the way out.


	2. Chapter 2

**Wonderful Life**

* * *

><p>Dash cuddles against her, whimpering, sounding like a toddler again, his fingers tangled in the hair at her neck.<p>

"It's okay, baby," she murmurs, juggling his backpack, her own bag, the boy. She remote locks the car, shifts him higher in her arms, heads for the elevator in their parking garage.

"Momma," he mutters, rubbing his face in her neck.

She called the pediatrician on the way back from the kids' preschool, confirmed it was the chicken pox after she sent them a picture of his spots, then stopped off at the corner drugstore for Calamine lotion. Dr. DeLameran has given her some suggestions, but there really aren't drugs for chicken pox. If it gets bad, DeLameran can give him an antiviral, but that shouldn't be necessary.

"Momma."

"Yeah, baby," she murmurs into his ear, stepping onto the elevator. "How do you feel?"

He gives a pitiful noise against her chest, his teeth at her collarbone like he did when he was a baby. She leans in and presses the button for their floor.

"No biting, Dash. I know you feel bad, but you're four years old. We'll get some medicine when we get upstairs, okay?"

"I feel bad," he whines, draws his arms tightly around her neck.

"I know," she sighs, shifting side to side as the elevator lifts. He lays his cheek against her shoulder, his mouth open as if it's too much energy to breathe through his nose. Kate curls her hand through his hair, scratches lightly until she feels scabbed bumps.

He whimpers.

"I know, I know, poor baby." He's got chicken pox on his scalp? Jeez, this is going to be miserable for them both.

She steps off the elevator, and since they're the only ones on this floor, she drops their bags in the hall in favor of getting a better handle on Dash. He's a heavy four year old, and awkward, all thin and long limbs, bony knees at her ribs.

He whines against her skin, making those pitiful Castle noises as she heads for their door. Keys still in her hand, she jostles Dash trying to get the door unlocked, murmurs against the top of his head as he mewls at her.

"Okay, sweetheart, it's not the end of the world," she laughs. "Come on. You and Daddy, such big babies."

"Me and Daddy?" he asks, tilting his head to look at her.

She nudges the door wider with her toe and carries him into the living room. "You and Daddy are so alike. All this drama."

"What's drama, Mommy?"

"Hm. A lot of emotion. A lot of heart in things. All right out here where everyone can see it and pay attention."

"Oh, I like drama then."

She chuckles and presses her lips to his temple. "I know you do, my best man. Where do you want to camp out? Couch or bed?"

"Couch," he says with relish.

"All right. Let me drop you there and then go back for our stuff."

Of course, he tightens his arms around her neck, bringing his mother down with him as she tries to make him bounce in the couch cushions. He giggles at her, and her heart lifts at the sound, so she plays it up, staggers over him, falls on top of him on the couch as peals of laughter erupt from his little body.

"Mommy, Mommy, Mommy," he gasps, his hands tugging at her ears to pull her away.

She lifts up, smiling at him, and he collapses back against the couch, cheeks flushed, forehead damp. She bites her lip and brushes her hand against his skin. "Okay, change of plans. Let's get you some water and some medicine first, okay, wild man?"

"Mm, no medicine?"

"Yeah, medicine."

"I don't like it," he whines. "I can't, Mommy. Don't make me."

"I know you have trouble, but I'll help you. And we have banana popsicles in the freezer, baby. You want one after you take your medicine?"

His eyes brighten, but his mouth is still twisted. He's always had trouble with this. They tried the chewables, but no. No good. He's still got to take the liquid tylenol, and even that is an ordeal. He's going to gag, and she's going to waste four or five doses trying to get it down him, but he has a fever. And she'll have to be tough.

"Popsicle for medicine. Deal?"

He sighs. "Deal."

* * *

><p>"Can I stay in here all day?" Dash says with a sigh.<p>

She chuckles and brushes the wet hair off his face. She's added two cups of finely ground oatmeal to his bath water, along with the lavender bubble bath. Dashiell has immediately stopped trying to scratch the angry looking places on his torso. He even has a spot on his big toe, another under his chin. He's got it bad.

"Where's my Ellie?" he murmurs, closing his eyes as his shoulders slump. She swipes her finger over a stain of red under his chin, a spot of children's tylenol. What an ordeal. He's all worn out from their epic battle to get the medicine down him.

"She's staying with Papa tonight."

"Oh," he says, sounding sad. Kate pushes her fingers through his hair, lightly rubbing his scalp. He hums, the sound high and babyish in his throat, his head moving to seek her hand. She won't let him scratch, but he gets to dictate the next spot she has to rub.

"How's that?" she says quietly.

His eyes open, mirrors to her own. "Good, good. More?"

"Little more," she says, trailing the flat of her nails along his scalp, over the bumps, careful not to pick at them. She cups the back of his head and leans over to kiss the tip of his nose.

He laughs and opens his eyes, his lashes tangling with hers. "Hey, Mommy."

"Hey, my sweet boy. You feel better?"

"The bath is so good."

She grins and rubs at the nape of his neck, then down his back through the bubbles. His shoulders squirm with delight.

"Can we call Daddy?" he says.

"Sure. Your daddy said he couldn't get to his phone until eight though."

"Can I leave a message?"

"Of course."

"Video message?" he asks, lifting one little eyebrow.

"That too, if you want." She strokes a thumb over his shoulder, eyebrows furrowed as she feels more chicken pox than he had only an hour ago.

He sinks down a little further into the bath. "Can I have my toys?"

She wrinkles her nose at him. "There's oatmeal in the bath."

"So? Oatmeal's good, Mommy."

Kate sighs. She'll have to run the bath toys through the dish washer to get the oatmeal out. Ooh, actually, that might cook it. Not a good idea. She is not washing his bath toys by hand-

"Please? I'm sick, and I don't feel good, and I want to play with my spider-mans."

Jeez, she's a sucker for that face. Has Castle been giving him lessons?

"Okay, baby. All right. Let me go find them."

"First can you itch me?"

"Where?"

He lifts both arms and thrusts his chest out. "All here. Alllll over."

Kate's lips twist at his display, but she rubs her fingers over his torso, giving him a good, soft scratch.

He sighs, arms drooping, and she takes a moment to slosh more oatmeal bathwater over his skin.

"How's that?"

"The best. Now my spider-mans?"

"Okay, fine. Spider-man." She flicks water and bubbles into his face as she lifts from her knees, smiling at his giggle.

Feeling better then. Good.

* * *

><p>She cuddles him on the couch, his skin damp and smelling like oatmeal and mint, his body cooler now than an hour ago, but still a little furnace, like his father. Kate scrolls through the guide on satellite, murmuring the names of shows to him as she goes.<p>

"No Noggin, Mommy," he says petulantly, his fingers playing with the hem of her shirt. She changed into jeans and a Yankees raglan while he played in the bath and she feels better now. Less sticky. Less germy too.

"Okay. Cartoons? Tom and Jerry, Scooby Doo-"

He sighs. "Something new."

"New?"

"Can we watch one of Daddy's shows?"

"No," she answers automatically. Disney? He scorns Disney. Any Star Wars on here, because he loves the Storm Troopers-

"Please, Mommy? Daddy's got cartoons. Here let me show you." He takes the remote from her and calls up the list of recorded shows, scrolls through them. "See? This one."

"Can you read that?"

He presses his mouth into a hard line, concentrates. "Um. V-vuh. . .I don't know that first word. Something. Brothers."

"Uh-huh. Venture Brothers. And that's a big time no."

"What about this one? Uh. . .oh. Daddy let me watch this one. Aqua Teen Hunger Force."

"Daddy did, huh?"

"It's good. I like it."

Kate lets him select the last show, wary about it. As it begins to play somewhere in the middle (Castle apparently has let him see this then), it's - uh - not exactly easy to follow and - no. No. Nope. "Too silly for me," she sighs. "Let's try something else."

She takes the remote back from him and scrolls through the adultswim stuff, moving past it to get to the seasons of shows he's got permanently installed on the DVR. Babylon 5, Battlestar Galactica, a few series of Doctor Who, Fir-

"Oh, Mommy, what about that one?" Dash says, grabbing the remote and rising to his knees on the couch. "Mommy, this is the one about the space cowboys. Oh please, oh please, oh please-"

"Baby, I don't know-"

"Daddy fast forwards through stuff when we watch his cartoons. So you could do that?"

She chews on her bottom lip and nods. "Okay. We'll watch the space cowboys."

* * *

><p>Kate doesn't mean to get sucked in but-<p>

But.

Ack.

She's sucked in.

When the pilot plays with dinosaurs, Dashiell gets sucked in too. They are both in it, and even though Kate should fast forward through a few of these scenes, should really not let Dash see _that_, she keeps forgetting. She covers his eyes twice, but he giggles and leans around her, rubs his face in her chest, squirms down to see.

Kate pushes her legs to the end of the couch and leans back on Dash's pillow, the boy draped over her chest, eyes drooping from the Benadryl. He hasn't been too itchy, which is good, but Dash keeps ordering her to rub her fingers over the spots on his back. She'll break out the Calamine lotion tomorrow.

The Reavers appear onscreen, the mysterious ship drifting close in space, and Kate feels tingles of terrible awareness crawl up her spine. She thumbs the fastforward button, but hesitates, glances down at Dashiell.

His eyes are closed, mouth open. Probably asleep.

She keeps watching, unable to help herself. There's something dour and alluring about the Captain, something that appeals to the dark in herself. She thinks he would be someone who understood-

"Oooh, them is bad guys," Dashiell slurs.

Kate startles, glances down at the boy. "You awake still?"

"Mm-hm, them bad guys, Mommy. They wear skin coats?"

Oh jeez. "Just a way of talking. Not really. Just trying to scare us."

Dashiell shivers, but he's grinning, blinking hard to keep his eyes open. Her little Halloween baby.

"Sleep if you want, Dash."

"I scratchy. Can you itch me?"

Castle would roll his eyes at the imprecise word choice, but she thinks it's cute. "Where?"

"Here and here and here," he says, wriggling his shoulders.

Kate brushes the back of her fingers over his spots, the hard keratin of her nails making him sigh.

"That's good. Oh, look at that!"

She glances back to the tv, her arms loose around her son, and finds herself caught in the show again.

"I like the girl in the box," he murmurs suddenly.

"River?"

"I want to ride in a box sometime."

"Sure you do."

"I could color inside. It would be my ship. It would be dark and close. I would like that."

"Mm, you would," she murmurs, watching that Captain. Sexy as hell. She misses Castle. He's pretty sexy himself.

"I miss Daddy."

Kate huffs a laugh, squeezes Dashiell a little tighter. "I was just thinking the same thing."

* * *

><p>She can't believe she let her son watch four episodes of this show.<p>

"Captain Tight Pants!" the boy giggles again, sprawled out on the other side of the couch. He lifts his head and a foot. "Itch me."

She absently rubs at his ankle, in that same spot as earlier, clicks the television off. "Okay. No more space cowboy for now. We'll give it a rest and watch more later."

"Captain Tight Pants," he laughs, flopping his head back onto the pillow she dragged out from her bedroom. He's got hers, she's got his.

"Uh-huh," she remarks, realizing that's gonna get old real fast.

"Can we call Daddy now?"

"We already left him a video."

"Is he not at his phone now?"

It takes her a moment to realize what he means and then she sits up, patting his legs. "Eight o'clock. We have, hmm, two more hours. You hungry, kiddo?"

"I could have ice cream?"

"You could have a hot dog."

"I could have it for dessert?"

"We'll see," she warns, shifting to get to her feet, jostling Dash's legs to make him giggle. She's just about to head for the kitchen when her phone rings.

Maybe Castle got out early?

"Daddy?" Dash asks, lifting up to look at her phone.

Kate scoops it off the coffee table. "Oh no. Just Papa," she says, answering it.

"Just Papa?" her father laughs on the other end.

"Sorry, Dad. Dash was looking for Rick."

"And well, that's similar to why I'm calling," he says gently. "Ellery's looking . . . weepy-eyed at me. I think she wants to come home, sweetheart."

"Oh," Kate sighs, closing her eyes. "Can you put her on the phone?"

"I can try."

After a moment of rustling, Kate listens hard and finally thinks she can hear her daughter's breathing. "Baby girl? What's wrong? Papa said you're sad?"

There's a hitched breath, and a pitiful noise. Kate can hear her father urging the girl to talk, but there's nothing, no voice. She glances over at her son, covered in chicken pox-

but what the hell. The more the merrier.

"Ella," she says softly. "Please talk to me."

A little whimper from the other end and then the breathy sound of her name.

"Mommy."

"Okay, okay. Papa will bring you home. Don't be sad, little cricket."


	3. Chapter 3

**Wonderful Life**

* * *

><p>"<em>Kako si, zlato moje malo?"<em> she murmurs against the top of his head.

He stirs and rubs his face into her chest. "Feel hot."

She's not surprised he knows the meaning - she's asked him so many times now tonight if he feels okay that it probably sounds exactly the same no matter what language she uses. "Your temperature is back up now that the medicine has worn off."

"No, Mommy. No more medicine. It tastes so bad."

"I know. But you'll feel so much better. _Idemo popit lijek."_

"I don't want to."

"Just a little bit. And then a Benadryl chaser. You like that one, remember?"

"What's 'chaser'?"

She presses her lips together and shifts him off her chest as she explains. "It's when you drink something that's easier to swallow than the first. So we'll do the medicine - which will taste bad, but you'll be okay - and then we'll take the Benadryl so that the last taste you have on your tongue-"

"Ohhh, Mommy you're so smart."

She laughs and leaves him sprawled on the couch, brushes her fingers over his forehead. "Thank you, baby. I have my moments. Stay cool; I'll get the medicine."

While she's pouring out the right measurements, her phone rings from the coffee table.

"Hey, see if it's a picture you recognize," she calls out. "And answer it if you-"

"It's Daddy!" Dashiell crows, scooping up her phone.

Kate listens as her son answers, excitement crackling through his voice. And maybe some dehydration in it too. Hm. She needs to get him to drink more water.

"Hi, hi, hi," Dashiell chirps into her phone.

Rolling her eyes, Kate fills a water bottle for him as well, brings everything back to the couch, sitting in front of him on the coffee table.

"Yes. I got bumps all over me. But Mommy is itching them-"

Dash's explanation is cut off; she watches him listen.

"No, it's not too bad," he says. "Mommy's a good itcher."

Kate holds the water out for him, nudges his elbow with it. Dashiell takes the sport bottle and sucks down a mouthful as he listens to his father. She wriggles her hand for the phone.

"Hold on, Daddy. Mommy wants to talk-" Dash thrusts the phone at her and attacks his water bottle.

She takes the call, picking up Dash's old cup from the floor, shaking it. Ah, he was out. Okay, makes sense. "Castle?"

"Hey. I got out early. How's he doing?"

"Doing good. Had an oatmeal bath, trying to get Dash to take a little more medicine. Right, buddy?'

He makes a face.

Castle sighs. "Good luck with that."

"Here, baby, take this." Kate tugs the water out of his grip and hands him the dosing spoon filled with bright pinkish-red liquid tylenol. Dashiell sighs loudly but takes it from her.

"Need me to talk to him?" Castle asks over the phone.

"Nope, cause Dash is going to take it, no problem. Right, my man?"

He grimaces and puts it to his lips, slowly, agonizingly tilts his head back.

"Sure he is. Right," Castle grumbles into the phone. "If he takes it for you-"

"Oh, good job, baby," Kate grins around her praise, hands him back his water.

"No," Dash says, choking a little, making a terrible face. "Chaser. Chaser, Mommy."

"Right." She gives him the Benadryl in a similar dosing spoon, hears Castle gasping on the other end.

"He drank the kool-aid? You are kidding me."

"Dash is a big kid," she encourages, talking to both of them really. "You got it, buddy. Benadryl chaser. And then your water."

She watches his throat work as he swallows roughly, the way his gag reflex kicks in and his shoulders hunch. Kate smooths her hand over his leg, letting him know she's there.

"How'd that go?" Castle rumbles from the phone.

"Going good. You got it, Dash. Very good. Oh, good job. Okay, drink your water, wash the taste out."

"Worked good, Momma," he says, croaking around the combination of tastes in his mouth. "Chaser."

She grins back. "Chaser." At that moment, the buzzer sounds from downstairs - the doorman letting her know that her father is coming up. "Here, want to talk to Daddy?"

Dash takes the phone from her, letting Kate hop up and cross to the door, unlock it. She leaves it open a crack so that they can come on in, as usual, and Kate heads back to the couch in time to catch the last of Dash's comments.

"-baseball game?"

Ohh, darn. She forgot. They were supposed to go to the game this weekend in celebration of Rick getting back in town. She sighs and shakes her head at Dash. "Not likely, sweetheart. You're contagious."

Dashiell sighs. "Mommy says I'm - I don't know that one, Mommy."

"Contagious. You'll spread chicken pox to everyone."

"You gonna get chicken pox?"

"I've already had it. I can't get it again." Hopefully. She's had it twice because the first time was such a light case, and then of course, there's shingles too. Oh, maybe her father and Kelly should stay clear of Dash tonight.

"Daddy, you already have my pox?"

Kate grins to herself and hears the elevator ding from down the hall. She picks the pillows up off the floor, lightly clobbers Dash with his, making him giggle, and then gets up to greet her father.

Ellery is first through the door, barreling into Kate's legs and squeezing, face pressed into the denim of her jeans. Kate leans over with a soft laugh, rubs her daughter's back as her dad and Kelly come inside the apartment.

"Hi, Katie." Her father reaches out and hugs Kate tightly, even as Ellery scrambles to climb Kate's legs, trying to get up.

"Words, baby girl," she mutters, a hand darting out to catch her daughter before she slips. "Use your words. Hey, Dad. Thanks for trying to keep her."

"How's Dash?" Jim asks, heading further into the living room. He gives Dashiell a high-five, nods to the phone as he looks back to Kate.

"It's Rick. Ellery, baby, don't pinch. Here." She leans over and scoops the girl up, kissing her neck to silly her out of the fierce scowl on her face. "Were you sad?"

Ella buries her face in Kate's shirt, making her mother sigh and rub her back slowly. "It's okay to be sad, to miss your mommy and Dash-"

"And Daddy," she whispers softly.

"Oh, I know. I miss Daddy too." Kate rubs her nose against Ellery's cheek, kisses her ear. "Come see your brother, but don't get too close. He's sick. And then you can talk to Daddy on the phone, okay?"

Ellery lifts her head and squirms to get down, so Kate sets her feet on the floor and watches her run to the couch.

"Not too close," her father says, reaching out and catching her before she can scramble up. "Wait here."

"Hey, it's my sister," Dash says into the phone, waving at Ella with his free hand. "Here, Daddy wants to talk."

"Whoa, wait, wait," Kate calls out, grabbing the phone before Ellery can take it. "Hold on, Castle."

"Yeah, clean it off or something. I think there's wipes under the kitchen sink," he says.

"Good idea." She rubs her hand through Ellery's hair, trying to dislodge that frown. "Wait, cricket. Let me clean it."

Her father picks up the little girl and sits in a chair while Kate heads for the kitchen, looking for clorox wipes.

"Hey," Castle says quietly over the phone. "I miss you."

She squats down behind the kitchen island in front of the sink, opens the cabinets and closes her eyes for a moment, letting his voice wash over her.

"Miss you more," she sighs, opening her eyes again and looking for the wipes.

"You're a good mom," he murmurs. "I love you."

She finds the wipes at the back, pulls them out, puts her forehead against the wood of the cabinet, sighs. "I love you too."

"Okay, clean the phone, hand me off to Ellery. I guess she got homesick?"

"Yeah. Dad just brought her up."

"She scowling?"

Kate laughs as she stands back up, heads for the living room. "Scowling something fierce."

"I'll laugh it out of her," Castle says, and she can hear the relish in his voice. Nothing he likes better than being silly for his kids.

"You're always good at that," she answers. "You do the same for me."

"Yeah, where do you think I got all my practice?"

She laughs and tugs a wipe out of the canister. "All right, cleaning the phone. Call me later?"

"Usual."

"Good."

Kate wipes off the phone's screen, the protective case, then hands it over to Ellery, taking a moment to kiss her daughter's forehead. "Daddy wants to talk to you, sweet girl."

As Ellery holds the phone up to her ear, Kate retreats to the couch, giving her father and Kelly both a smile, and then sitting beside Dashiell.

He curls up around her, head in her lap, and sighs. "Itch me, Mommy."

Right. Yes. Itch the boy with the pox.

* * *

><p>After her father and Kelly leave, and Castle has hung up, it feels like all the fun has been sucked out of the room. Ellery refuses to sit alone in the chair while Kate and Dash get to curl up together. Kate really can't blame her for not wanting to be left out, but-<p>

Oh well. Screw it. They'll both get chicken pox. When Kate got it the first time, she remembers her best friend's mother sending the girl over to Kate's house so that she'd catch it too, get it over with.

"All right, fine. Climb up," she says, lifting her lips into a smile for her daughter.

Ellery grins back and uses both hands to push her hair out of her face, then scrambles up onto the couch.

"Come sit on this side of me, not near your brother. He's too hot." And contagious, but let's say feverish.

Ellery climbs over her lap to settle at her other side, both kids burrowing in closer, little bodies trying to compete with each other for how much of mommy they can claim.

Kate glances down at Ellery's fierce little face, then over to Dashiell's exhausted, itchy one. Both kids look a little worse for wear - she probably does too. They all miss Daddy.

"Okay. How about this. Let's have a Pox Party," she says, squeezing both kids closer.

Dash sits up, looking at her. "What's a Pox Party?"

"It's a party for a kid who has chicken pox. So here's what we'll do. Ellery, go find every pillow and blanket from all the beds and the hall closet, okay? Dash, you find the Calamine lotion and get your water bottle, all that stuff, and start a camp out here in front of the tv. Help your sister if she needs it."

"Like a huge blanket fort?"

"Exactly like it. I'm going to make us hot fudge sundaes while you both work on the fort-"

"Yay! Sundaes!"

"Then we can watch a movie-"

"Not Totoro," Dash says quickly, shooting a glance at Ellery. Not that Ella was going to say anything at all, but apparently Dash sees she was thinking it. Loudly.

"Okay, wait. Hold on. No fighting," she interrupts. "We'll pick a few movies we each like, and then we'll try to agree on a couple. Okay?"

Both kids nod at her.

"All right. Ready? Go."

Ella is the first to scramble off the couch, heading for the master bedroom and the best fort-making blankets. Both kids know exactly what to do - they've done it before.

Kate pushes on Dashiell's shoulder. "You going?"

"I'm going," he says, then gives her a slow grin. "I get a pox party. This is gonna be awesome."

Kate certainly hopes so. Maybe she can be just as much fun as Daddy.

Okay, probably not. But she can get close.

* * *

><p>Kate fishes for her phone in the nest of pillows and blankets in the floor of the living room, answers it when she can finally get her fingers on it.<p>

"Hey, Castle," she says softly.

"Kids asleep?"

"Mm, yeah. All over me." She's propped up in one of Castle's video game chairs, which is basically a cushion with a back to it, while the kids are sprawled in her lap, Dash on her right, Ella on her left, the huge tent strung up with blankets from the couch to the doors of the entertainment center and back to the windows.

"What're you doing?" he laughs.

"Pox party in the living room floor. I let Dash eat two bowls of ice cream and Ellery had nutella on toast - four slices."

"Ooh, they're getting away with murder."

She laughs back and Dashiell stirs; Kate lowers her voice. "We made a blanket fort. Like you always do with them."

"Oh yeah? I did that with Alexis too."

"Yeah," she grins, can so picture a little red-haired girl curling up with her dad. "We watched movies."

"Totoro?"

"Yeah, Dash gave in on that one. And then Star Wars."

"Score."

She rolls her eyes and strokes her fingers through Ellery's dark hair. "We played hide and seek after Star Wars, to wear them out a little."

"Dash can play?"

"Yeah, actually, helps to keep him distracted so he doesn't think about how scratchy he is."

"Ahh, there's the culprit," he murmurs. "You're the one encouraging him to say it wrong."

She grins, tries to keep the laugh from coming out of her throat. "Caught me."

He gives a melodramatic sigh and she can just picture him, shaking his head at her. "Aiding and abetting, Beckett. You know you can serve time for that."

"You the grammar police?"

"Yes," he growls.

"What're you gonna do to me? Punish me?"

He gives a breathy laugh that makes her toes curl, and she really wants him here. And the kids not piled on top of her. And mostly him here.

The silence stretches on between them for a little longer; she can hear him breathing in the phone, the way he putters around his hotel room as he gets ready for bed.

Eleven o'clock, their usual. She's just been dozing in the floor, enjoying being with her kids while the television is on mute, one of those late show guys, and now she's suddenly missing him all the more.

"Hey," she says.

"Hey."

"Tomorrow, yeah?"

"Flight leaves at two."

"Kids miss you."

"You miss me too," he says.

"Yeah. Definitely."

"Ditto - all around."

She grins and smooths her hand down Ellery's back, her thumb over the ridges of the girl's spine. "So what did you do today?"

"Hm. Got up. Had coffee that tasted like heaven. It was so great I'm almost ashamed to tell you because you'd be so very jealous of me."

"I'm not jealous," she says easily. "I'm lying in the floor with two sacked out kids at the end of a very successful pox party. Not a bit jealous of some measly _great coffee_."

"Ah, you are so right. I'm jealous now."

"You should be."

"Take a picture for me."

"What?" she laughs, cradling her phone against her ear with her shoulder so she can adjust Dashiell's hold on the blu ray player's remote control, slide it out of his grip now that he's deep enough asleep not to wake.

"Come on, hold your phone out and take a photo and send it to me."

"You're nuts."

"No, just - not where I want to be right this minute. So take a picture, Beckett."

"And rub it in?"

"Sure," he laughs.

Kate does as he asks, fumbles with her phone one-handed as she sends it to him, then gets back on the line. "Sent. To your email."

"Ah okay, hold on."

She listens to him on the other side, hears something creak, so he must be in bed now.

"Oh, that's beautiful," he murmurs.

"I'm not sure how you could even see anything. The only light that's on is the kitchen light."

"Dark and cozy. I can see enough."

She smiles to herself. "So. After your great coffee?"

"After my abysmal coffee-"

Kate laughs.

"-I had that interview with EW magazine-"

"Oh, yeah. I forgot about that. How'd it go?"

"Uh, well, pretty great actually. It was fun. We'll see what it looks like in print. They did ask for a family photo shoot-"

"Oh?"

"So um, up to you, Kate. They want to send a photographer out when I get back, or else have us meet one at a studio."

"Are you serious?"

"Yeah."

She bites her bottom lip. "Well. If that's - what does your publicist say?"

"Don't worry about that."

"What do _you_ think, Rick?"

His silence is just a moment, really just a hesitation before he goes on, but it tells her all she needs to know. "It's up to you, Kate."

"You think we should," she murmurs. "Okay. Do we get to keep any of the photos?"

He chuckles softly down the line. "Want me to make that a part of the deal?"

"Well, I think after Dash was born, we did a pretty good job handling the issues about photographs the paparazzi took. So - more of the same, right? We give them a little, then they're more willing to work with us on keeping the kids out of the spotlight."

"Yeah. It seems to work. And it's not like I'm really that famous."

Kate laughs hard, dislodging Ellery's head from her thigh, having to catch her. "Oh, oops. Wow. You just admitted that?"

"I figured I'd get that in there before you could. Just, you know, pre-empt you there."

"Consider me pre-empted," she chuckles. "Okay then. Set it up, Castle. We'll do it.

He laughs back, something rich and good and intimate in his voice that wraps around her just like he was there, like she had him right in front of her.

"Thanks, Kate."


	4. Chapter 4

Kate wakes sluggish and heavy, tries to figure out what's wrong, where she is. Her whole body is stiff; her eyes crusted with sleep.

She snakes her tongue out along her bottom lip, tries to lift her lids.

Bright sunlight - too bright - she groans and turns her head to find little eyes watching her.

Sucking in a surprised breath, Kate brings her hand up to touch Ellery's face. "You awake?" she whispers.

Ellery scoots in closer, her little face nuzzling her mother's shoulder. Kate curls her hand around Ella's neck and kisses the top of her head.

Movement, flickering catches her eye and she looks up to find the television on, still mute, but with the closed captioning on. Like Dashiell can read closed captioning - even though he apparently knows how to find it on the menu, strangely enough. She snorts and turns to find him asleep beside her, his body flushed and sweaty, but his breathing good, his spots just the same. He's clutching the remote, looks like he fell asleep watching early morning cartoons.

Kate checks his forehead and then draws Ella up into her side and tries to stand.

Her head hits the top of the blanket fort - she forgot - and she stumbles with Ellery, making the girl giggle even as Kate tries to regain her balance, not trip over her other kid.

She huffs as she gets clear of the area, has to maneuver around the couch to the kitchen. "You hungry, baby girl?" Kate checks the time as she goes for the cereal, nearly drops Ella when she sees that it's already eleven o'clock.

Ohhh. Okay. Well that explains why baby girl was awake. Kate laughs and hikes Ellery higher on her hip, drags a hand through her hair, feeling gritty and overdone. Ug. Though Castle is gonna laugh when he hears how late she slept.

Ellery wriggles in her arms and points to the Cocoa Pebbles.

"Ug, yeah, okay, I don't care." Kate grabs the cereal. Castle bought it before he left, and Kate's fairly certain Dashiell and Ella have been working together trying to reach it. This or the nutella. Depending on the time of day, probably.

She pours out cereal one-handed into a bowl, Ella leaning into her chest and so very quiet, watching every movement her mother makes. Kate kisses the soft, warm cheek settled so close to hers and takes the kid and the cereal over to the bar, drops Ella down in the chair.

"Eat up, sweet girl. Let me wake your brother."

Ellery likes her cereal dry and no spoon - just fingers - and Kate isn't in the mood to make her eat it like a civilized human being. She heads back for Dash in the floor, bringing his water with her, and crouches over him.

"Dash? Baby, time to wake up."

His eyes actually flutter as they open, those beautifully long lashes caressing his cheeks, and then he smiles at her, all morning delight and fever haze.

"Hi, Mommy," he says. "I had a dream."

"Oh, you did?"

"There were Reavers and I was running away with the Captain and then Ellery hid under the bathroom sink in the cabinets and I had to find her and save her."

Doesn't sound scary. He's grinning at her too. "Did you save her?"

"I don't know." He shrugs, seems unconcerned, and curls onto his side to get to his knees. Dash shivers and bounces a little, then crawls into her lap. "Carry you."

"Don't talk like a baby," she sighs, kissing a spotless patch on his cheek. "How're you feeling?"

"Mmm, I think lots of itchy. Can I have a bath with cereal again?"

"An oatmeal bath?"

"Yeah."

"Sure, baby. And I have some calamine lotion for you too - it'll help all the spots."

"No more medicine?"

She presses the back of her hand against his neck, skirts his cheek to feel his forehead. "We'll see. I'll take your temperature after your bath. Did you wake up this morning and watch tv?"

He gives her a sly look from under his lashes. "You always let me watch tv when I'm sick."

"I do, yes. Did you turn it on cartoons this morning?"

He nods.

"What were the numbers on the clock?"

He shrugs.

"You're not in trouble. I'm just curious."

"I think. I think four started it. Cause I'm four."

"Hmm, okay. That's pretty early," she murmurs, shifting to get to her feet with Dashiell in her arms. He curls around her, arms and legs against her ribs, burying his face in her shirt, snuggling down. "Want to eat breakfast before your bath?"

He shakes his head, rubbing his face against her, working his shoulder blades under his skin so that they pop out like wings. "Can you itch me real good?"

Kate presses her fingertips to the soft cotton of his tshirt, feels the chicken pox even through the material. She rubs with her knuckles, slowly, deep pressure, and smiles at the sigh that pushes out of him.

"More, more."

She lets her nails trail down his back, using the flat edges to almost scrape. Not quite.

"Oh more, more, more-"

She laughs, tries to not sound too mean about it, kisses his ear. "Okay, we'll do a good scratch when you're ready for the bath. Want to take one in Mommy and Daddy's bathroom again?"

"Can I?"

"Sure. Still sick, aren't you?"

"Can you tell me a story in the bath?"

"What kind?"

He shivers and squirms, but she knows it's not to get down; it's just the itchy places. He's even got spots on his neck, the back of his hands, poor kid.

"What kind of story?" she asks, moving through her bedroom and into the master bath.

"A Beckett story."

"Oh? Okay. I can do that. Here, get down and start stripping. I'm gonna check on our baby girl."

She lowers him to the bath mat, careful to keep his feet from touching the cold tile, and he lets go of her, moves a hand to scratch. Kate catches him by the wrist, lifts an eyebrow.

"I'm just so itchy all over me."

"I know. But try to remember. I'll start the bath." She left the oatmeal she ground up last night in a plastic bag by the sink, so once the water starts running, Kate adds in the last of it. "This time, we'll try it without bubbles. I think the soap might make the itching worse."

Dash is already sitting on the floor and pulling his socks off. She leaves him to it and heads back for the kitchen, nearly collides with Ellery in the hallway off the bedroom.

The bowl of cereal in her hands clatters to the hardwood, and they both stand still, staring down at the mess.

Kate sighs and sinks to her knees, brushes a hand over the cereal to start gathering it up. "Coming to find us? It's okay. Accidents happen."

Ellery leans against her mother's shoulder as Kate balances on her toes, scraping cereal back into the bowl as best she can. The girl's weight shifts, sending Kate rocking backwards; she reaches out and catches herself on the wall, shooting Ella a glance.

"What's up with you, huh? Looking sad, baby girl."

Ellery winds an arm around Kate's neck and her fingers play at her mother's ear. Every time - it gets her every time. When Dash does it, when Ellery does it now, seeking comfort. She presses her cheek against Ellery's, closes her eyes a moment.

"Did you get enough to eat?" She opens her eyes.

Ella nods, looking solemn.

"You don't want more?"

Kate gets only a slight shake of the girl's head in answer.

"Okay, _moja ljubav, _let's clean up the rest of this, and then we'll figure out what we can do until Daddy gets home."

Little eyes lift, light up so brilliantly blue, a smile stretching across that face.

"Yeah, me either," Kate murmurs, leaning in to kiss Ella's nose.

* * *

><p>This is not ideal. But it's the best she can do.<p>

Sitting in the video game chair (again, jeez, this has been the best stupid, impulse purchase Castle has ever made) on the bathroom floor with her daughter in her lap and her son in the bathtub pretending to be either the big fish from Jonah or a mermaid, depending on his mood, Kate tries to remember where she left off in the story.

"The freezing, Mommy. It was freezing."

She sighs. She doesn't want to tell this one - not because of bad memories or anything, but because she's not sure she likes telling her two small children about how one time she and their father were locked in a freezer with a dead body as they tried to stop a bomb from going off.

Why, exactly, did she ever let Castle tell them this story to begin with?

Oh right, he likes to stress _exposition._

"Freezer. We were both in a freezer."

"And it was very cold. Where was the dead guy?"

Really? _Boys_. "At the very back. Daddy and I stayed near the door. I sat beside him and we hugged and tried to stay warm."

"But it was too too cold."

"It was." She watches the movie on the ipad over Ellery's shoulder; the older sister steps into the magic cat bus and goes riding through the night. This was the compromise. Ellery in the bathroom with them watching Totoro on the ipad.

"And?" Dashiell prompts, flipping over onto his stomach in the bathwater.

"And we fell asleep-"

"You were gonna die," Dash interjects.

Jeez, Castle. "But Tio and Uncle Kevin found us in time and they saved us."

"Yay! Tio and Uncle Kevin rescued you."

"They did. They always come through," she smiles.

Dashiell splashes again in the water. "Hey. I can touch my bottom with my foot."

Kate closes her eyes and presses her lips together but the laugh bubbles out anyway. "Ah, really?"

"Look, Mommy. See?"

She hums something encouraging, tilts her head back against the video game chair. It's really quite comfortable.

"Both feet. It's because I do karate. Like you."

She lifts her head to look at him. "Like me?"

"Daddy said you do karate," he says, now suspicious, his brow furrowed. He looks like he's found that a lot of the things Daddy says don't end up being exactly, specifically true.

_Welcome to my world._

"I - I do. Basically," she admits. "It's called mixed martial arts. But karate is a form of martial arts. So you and I both do karate."

"I can kick. And ee-yah!"

"You can," she laughs. "You want to hear another Beckett story about your daddy and karate?"

Both kids perk up, Ellery twisting around in Kate's lap while Dashiell sits up in the bath.

"Yeah!" Dash cheers.

* * *

><p>"And then Daddy fell on his butt," Kate finishes, grinning at the kids. Oops. "Bottom."<p>

"And I was how old, Mommy?" Dash says, still giggling, and maybe because she just said a bad word.

"You weren't born yet."

He's propped up his chin on his hands in the bathwater, lying on his stomach again, and he regards her with some confusion. "Where was I?"

Thank goodness they go to church. This is easy to answer now. "In heaven with God. Waiting to be born."

"Oh. Okay. So you and Daddy - when you got stuck in the freezer - all the Beckett stories that Daddy tells me and Ella - that was just you and Daddy and no me? No Ella either?"

She quirks her lips. "Yup. Just me and Daddy. Then you. Then Ella."

"Were Tio and Uncle Ryan born yet?"

Kate laughs so hard that she has to clutch Ellery to keep the girl from falling off her lap. "Oh, baby. How old do you think me and Daddy are?"

He shrugs at her, reaching back to scratch. She shakes her head at him and he sighs, squirms in the tub. "I don't know. How old?"

"Not that old. I'm 35 and Daddy is almost 45."

"How old?" Dash gasps, like it's some strange and crazy concept.

"Older than you," she rolls her eyes. "But Tio is older than me. And Uncle Ryan is too. But not as old as Daddy."

"Daddy is old," Dash whispers. "I'm only four. What happens when I'm forty-five?"

"You'll have a little boy of your own, maybe. Or you'll be a space cowboy on the moon where Daddy bought land."

"Daddy has moon land?"

"He does," Kate grins, shifts her knees so that Ellery's bony butt isn't digging into her mother's femur any longer. "You like the moon?"

"Not really. It's all grey. And dusty. I seen pictures."

"It is. Are you ready to get out now? It's lunch time. Way past. You haven't eaten."

"I'm not hungry." He thinks he isn't, but he really can't gauge that very well. She bets he's hungry once he gets moving.

"You need to eat." Ellery wriggles in her arms and slips down to the floor; Kate stands up, wincing as her feet tingle from sitting so long like that. "Come on, wild man. Let's get out."

"My water's cold."

"Well yeah, you've been in the tub for two hours. And you're all raisin-y."

Dash looks at his fingers, then sits up and brings his foot to his face, peering at his toes. "I am. Raisins every single one."

"Okay, raisin. Get on out. Pull the plug."

Dashiell pushes down on the handle for the drain and slowly gets to his feet. When he sways, Kate darts forward and grabs him by the upper arm, alarmed when his body goes a little limp.

"Dash? Baby-"

"I'm hungry now," he says, gives her a startled look.

"Yeah. I know you are. You have trouble figuring it out, remember?"

"I'm_ starving_, Mommy," he says, and his voice breaks in a whine. "My tummy hurts. I'm so hungry-"

"Okay, my man. I know. Let's not get melodramatic about it." She hoists him out of the tub and onto the bath mat, wraps him in one of their huge brown towels, rubbing his hair with one corner.

"Can I have nutella on toast?"

"I'll think about it."

He shivers and his teeth start to chatter, so Kate picks him up and nudges Ellery with her foot to get going. They parade out into the bedroom where Kate left his dry clothes she grabbed from upstairs.

"Mommy?"

"Yeah?" She sets his feet on their bed and pats him dry, trying not to aggravate his spots. She used one of Castle's expensive towels - the softest they have. Should keep from breaking open the sores.

"My engine is very low."

"Yeah, I can tell." She pokes his shoulder, dropping him to sit on the mattress with a bounce; he giggles and flops back in the bed, his wet hair curling a little at his forehead. "Put your clothes on, Dash."

She tosses the underwear onto his head and he giggles again, that high-pitched, breathless sound he makes when he's too tired, too stimulated, and beginning to shut down.

Kate feels a hand at her leg and glances down to find Ellery hanging on. She leans over and brushes her fingers through the girl's hair. "Hey,_ srce moje_, let's go scrounge up some lunch while your brother gets dressed."

She swings Ella into her arms and turns to see Dash bouncing on the bed, naked, his wet hair flopping on his head, other things flopping too. "Mommy can we get Thai?"

"No. Too spicy for Ellery."

"Can we get some Chinese?"

"No, wild man. I've told you before. It's got chemicals in it that mess you up, remember? We have to make it at home-"

"But I like it. It's so good."

"How about I make you pizza?"

"How about chips and salsa?" he says, still jumping on the bed, totally naked, making the conversation entirely ridiculous and hard to keep track of as she tries not to laugh.

Kate feels Ella's hand scrunch in her shirt and glances down; the girl is also wrinkling her nose, mimicking Kate.

"How about a compromise?" Kate suggests. "We'll order in lunch this afternoon, but we get to pick. Ellery and I."

Dashiell bounces once more and then collapses back on the pillowless, blanketless bed. "Okay, but make it something good."

"You can always put hot sauce on it," she tosses back, already heading for the kitchen.

"Yeah! Hot sauce for the win!"

Kate startles, laughing as she turns back to Dash. "For the win? Daddy say that?"

Dash shrugs, tugging on his underwear. "Sure. I don't know."

Kate rolls her eyes and heads out, rubbing Ella's back as the girl clutches her shirt tighter. When she gets to the kitchen, thinking about ordering Italian - creamy sauce to fatten Dash up - she realizes she's not seen her phone all morning.

Hmm.

"Ellery, what did you do with my phone, baby girl?"

Ella's little face turns mulish; she shows Kate her cheek and straightens her spine, pulling away.

"Yeah, I thought so. I need you to go get my phone. Stop hiding things, _moja mala svraka."_

Kate puts the girl on her feet, nudges her with a knee. Ellery makes her hands into fists, sets her jaw, not looking at her mother.

"Do I have to count to three?" Kate threatens.

Stony face.

"One."

Ella lifts her head, staring back at Kate, such deliberate intent on her expression that the kid doesn't even need the words. _Try me._

Kate's no stranger to it - it's her own face looking back at her. She bends over. "Two."

Ellery doesn't waver.

"Th-"

She bolts away, heading down the hallway, bare feet slapping the hardwood, and into Castle's study. Kate doesn't follow, knowing that the girl likes to keep her secrets. And that's fine.

So long as she gets her phone before Castle calls.

She doesn't want to miss him.

* * *

><p><strong>Since alerts aren't working, I wanted to let you all know that Sandiane Carter and I are posting chapter one of a new fic tomorrow or Sunday - Bucket List. Be looking for it.<strong>


	5. Chapter 5

"Hey guys," she calls softly, opening the door wider. "Daddy is almost here."

Two little heads pop up from the bed, blue eyes first, followed by the darker - and more tired-looking - brown.

"Daddy?"

"Yeah. Headed up in the elevator, he said."

Ellery scrambles up, slides out of her brother's bed. The moment her feet hit the floor, she's headed for the door, knocking past her mother to get to the hallway.

"Dash? You okay?"

He gets going too, a lot slower than his sister. Kate gave up trying to keep them apart. Ellery sometimes gets it into her head that the only person she can or will obey is her older brother, and when that happens, they just feed Dashiell what to say to get Ellery to do what she's supposed to. So Kate left Ellery in the care of her brother as both of them were supposed to be napping after lunch.

She heads further into the room and pulls back the bed covers. The Calamine lotion spread over his spots gives his skin a funny look, but Kate reaches out and brushes her hand through his hair. A little warm.

"How you feeling, baby?"

"I'm okay," he shrugs. "Daddy is coming?"

"On his way. Let's go see him."

Dash sways in the bed, so Kate gathers him up, heavy and still half-asleep, struggles upright with her son. "Whew, what a heavy boy."

"Itch me," he mumbles against her, rolling his head back and forth over her collarbone.

Kate huffs. "Can't, baby. My hands are kinda full."

He reaches up to scratch, but stops when his mother growls in his ear.

"Don't you dare. I can itch you when we get downstairs."

He rubs his face against her again, but she sighs and lets it go, choosing instead to get him down the hall. She has to go at an angle down the stairs, unable to see her feet, and then just as she reaches the next to last step, Ellery waiting on her very tiptoes in the entryway, the door opens.

Oh God, she's missed him.

Castle is grinning even as Ella barrels into his knees, wrapping both arms around his legs. He leans over, but his eyes are on Kate; he strokes a hand through Ellery's hair, drops his bag, then picks his daughter up.

Within two strides, he's at the stairs and pressing a hot kiss into her mouth, an arm encircling her. The kids wriggle between them, Dash jabbering and excited, a foot kicking her ribs, a hand against her neck, but all she feels is Castle.

They break finally to breathe, nose to nose, his chuckle vibrating her chest, his thumb brushing her cheekbone over and over.

"Love you, love you," she murmurs, kisses the skin just at her mouth, happens to be right under his eye. She can feel his lashes as his eyes close.

"So glad to be home," he says back.

"Daddy, you're squishing me."

They startle back, both laughing, and Castle takes Dash from her, both kids in his arms, both wrangling with each other to hook their arms around his neck, give him kisses.

"Careful, guys. Don't strangle Daddy now that we just got him home," Kate laughs, tugging down the back of Dash's shirt.

"You were gone so long," Dash whines.

"You missed me, huh?"

"I got pox!" Dash says, suddenly excited and bouncing. Kate catches him, pushes him into Castle to keep him from tipping backwards.

"I heard that. You look poxed," Castle says, smirking at his son.

"Let's let Daddy get in the door, guys," Kate says, moving past them to shut the front door. When she turns around, Castle is heading for the blanket fort still up in the living room.

"Whoa, you guys did an awesome job. Look at this thing. It's huge."

"Play in the fort with us, Daddy," Dash says, squirming to get down.

Kate nods when Castle looks over at her, but she glances at her watch on second thought. "Actually, Dash, you can play in the fort if you take some more medicine."

He sighs loudly, but Castle puts both kids down, scoots Dash towards Kate with a hand. "Hurry and take your medicine so the poxes won't bother you while we're in our fort. Ella and I will wait."

Dash trudges forward, takes his mother's hand, throwing a longing look over his shoulder. Then he turns bright and somewhat feverish eyes to her. "Are you snuggling with us too, Mommy? We can dogpile."

"Of course, baby. Wouldn't miss it."

* * *

><p>The Benadryl has knocked him out; Dash snores from the shelter of Castle's other arm, his fingers curled around his father's tie, body tucked close.<p>

Kate carefully slides the silk through the boy's hand, loosens it for Rick, dropping a kiss on his lips. He grins. "Thanks," he whispers.

"Any time, stud."

"Yeah, you totally missed me," he says, winking at her.

She smiles back at him, carefully leaning over Ellery between them, kisses him again, more slowly, until little fingers touch her neck. Kate pulls back and glances down.

"Hey, there, baby girl," she says. "Just helping Daddy loosen his tie."

"Is that what we're calling it now?" Castle says, sotto voce.

She flicks his ear, shaking her head, and slides his tie out from under his collar. "There. Better?"

"Better," he murmurs, grinning at her again. His arm, under Ellery's head, flexes so that his fingertips brush her cheek. Kate turns her head and kisses his palm.

Ellery's eyes droop, but she pushes on her mother to move. Kate drops back down on the other side of her daughter, glancing at the television; she was in Ella's way. Totoro has just started; it put Dash right to sleep and is doing the same to Ellery now.

Kate lowers her head to her arm and uses her free hand to brush her fingertips over her daughter's cheeks, her brow, down her nose.

"It's late," she whispers. "Sleep, sweet girl."

Castle's fingers stroke through Kate's hair; she closes her eyes briefly, reveling in it, then opens them again.

They spent the rest of the afternoon in the fort eating mac and cheese and pizza for dinner, Castle figuring out a way to use the couch cushions to keep the adults' backs from seizing up while they lounged in the floor. Every time the kids weren't climbing on him, Kate was, or rather, touching and brushing against him, letting her fingers, her palms, the slide of her knee tell him over and over he was missed.

She's pretty sure he knows, if the look in his eyes now is any indication. All soft and tender towards her.

His fingers curl around the top of her head even as she strokes Ella's face, mesmerizing the girl. He murmurs something to her that she doesn't catch, but she doesn't need to. It's all there between them.

She leans in and nuzzles Ella's cheek, dislodging Castle's fingers; the girl lifts a hand and pats her mother's neck, but her eyes have finally closed, and stayed that way.

Castle untangles an arm from Dash slowly, catching his head with his palm and putting him down gently into a pile of pillows, then curls on his side to face Kate and Ellery. He leans in and kisses Ella's forehead, brushes a finger down her nose.

"Good night, baby girl."

Kate smiles at the warmth in his voice, then lays her hand on Ella's stomach, kisses her as well. "Sweet dreams. Love you, Ella."

The girl's eyes flutter, beam brilliant, if tired, blue back at her mother. "All the ways."

Kate's heart flips. "Always," she murmurs in response.

* * *

><p>"Did you hear her?" Kate whispers in the darkness, the two little bodies on one side of the fort, she and Castle on this side, close.<p>

He shifts on top of her, solid and strong and heavy, a weight she's missed.

He traces her cheekbones with his fingertips, over and over, his thumbs sketching her lips. "I heard."

"I love the little sigh of her voice," she says, a sigh of her own as he dips his head and brushes his mouth over her collarbone.

"I love the quiet fierceness in it," he murmurs, his tongue at her skin.

Kate shivers, _so good_, and curls her arms around his shoulders, brushing against the scruff at his cheek with her mouth. "I love you," she whispers back.

"So I've been told," he laughs, and the sound travels between them, through her skin, down to her bones.

She loves this too, the tease of him above her when they've not done this for a while (though those times are rare, actually), the feel of his body pressed to hers, the sense of coming home.

"I don't like to leave," he says suddenly, his kiss so gentle against her lips.

"You seemed to have a good time," she says back, smiling slowly, nudging his nose with hers.

"Mm, okay time. You weren't there," he murmurs, then lifts his head, his eyes so liquid and blue even in the darkness. "Let's ditch the kids and take this party to the bed."

She sighs, glances past him to the little boy asleep only feet from them. "But Dash-"

He sighs, drops his forehead to hers. "We could. . ."

"No." Not right here. Not on the floor. "Or. Well, compromise? We could go to the bed for the party, come back out here to sleep? So Dash is close." She rocks her hips up against him, upping the ante quite suddenly.

He gasps, chuckling, his fingers delving into her hair and massaging her scalp. "Sounds like a plan."

She slides her hand down, and he catches her by the wrist.

"Ah-ah. Wait, truce. Leave me alone long enough to walk back to our bedroom, yeah?"

She grins back, smooths her hand against the plane of his stomach. "Sure. But hurry?"

He jumps up and disappears even as she laughs. He sticks his hand back under the fort, wriggling his fingers for her. She takes it, swings up into his arms, balancing on her toes.

"You want fast? I can do fast," he says, pushing an intense kiss to her mouth, teeth nipping at her bottom lip.

The spark flares up, catches fire. She shoves on his hips to get him moving, sees his eyes glittering.

"Get going, Castle."

"Slave driver," he mutters, but he's already turned towards the hallway, tugging her by the wrist.

Mm, best thing about being apart is coming back together.


End file.
